Now to talk about the one incident that almost made me call it quits. This incident occurred upon my recovery from my near death experience with the ninth exchange blood transfusion I had.

Like I stated in my last post, I woke up in the intensive care unit of the hospital asking myself who I was and trying to recollect my name and everything about myself. I had almost forgotten how to walk because each time I took a step my legs were jittery. I also had bed sores and could hardly take in any solid food without throwing it all up. With time everything started to dawn on me, how I had been admitted at the hospital as a result of weakness and my inability to breath properly, constantly gasping for air and how I was connected to a breathing apparatus and informed that I required an immediate exchange blood transfusion. I also recollected how the doctors were frantically trying to keep my blood pressure above the normal threshold and how I slept off in the process only to wake up fully eight days later.

One look at myself and I noticed the big sores on my lips. Most of the doctors that had monitored me whilst in ICU, were very happy when they heard I had woken up. The senior doctor had actually teased me on being a “Lazarus” in the bible. To say the truth, their outburst had actually caused it to dawn on me the gravity of what I had faced in the hospital. I was grateful to be alive and owed it to none else but Jesus. Overtime I was slowly integrated back into system and started accepting solid foods without throwing up. On the whole I spent a total of 14 days before I was discharged from the hospital.

Now when I made this discovery which I’m about to write about, I had already been discharged from the hospital, so to say when exactly the crises occurred is very difficult to ascertain. All I remember was driving in my car on the way to work and noticing that I could only hear from one of my ears. You heard right, only hear from one of my ears. Initially I thought it was as result of the medication from the experience I had at the hospital, so I wasn’t exactly moved by it.
In order to confirm what the problem was, I went back to the hospital to see my doctor and after some series of tests on my right ear they referred me to see an otolaryngologist i.e a doctor that specializes in diagnosing and treating diseases of the ear, nose and throat. This otolaryngologist doctor in-turn referred me to an audiologist to perform a hearing test and the result came back saying that I had profound hearing loss in my right ear and I could only hear very loud speech or loud sounds in that ear.

For the very first time since the onset of the incident, I found myself weeping about it. The otolaryngologist at my next appointment explained that sometimes in Sickle cell disease, a sickler may have a crises in the inner ear which could rupture one of the vessels and eventually lead to hearing loss.
He stated that I should contact the audiologist for suitable hearing aids for my right ear which I did.

This issue is one that was very difficult to own up to because writing this post was not easy for me. It brings me back to my question to you in my last post, if healing was what you desired from God and my thoughts to you if he decided not to heal. The fact that God sometimes chooses to permit some situations in our life is best known to him and he alone but that does not mean that he has chosen to stop loving us.
We all need to see things in an objective way and not in the pessimistic light sometimes. Many times when going through a trial, it’s so very easy to jump into conclusions and to question “why me”? It’s so very easy to doubt the love of God in our situation. For all you know unbeknownst to you, it’s simply because you are doing everything right and going somewhere so such issues come up to deter you and slow you down.

I had wept about it and it was time for me to move on with my life. There was no learning process, probably only a testing process. A trial to stop me from moving further and I chose to keep moving nonetheless. The question I needed to be honest about was if God decided not to heal me, will it cause me to question his goodness or his love for me? I have chosen what my answer will be, now the onus is on you to choose what yours will be in your situation.
Sometimes you think you’ve been through or are going through the worst kind of situation until you hear another person’s story. Don’t wait to be thankful until you hear the next person’s story, be thankful nonetheless whether you feel like it or not. Speak it, show it in your actions and live it. Don’t give it cause to wrinkle up your smile and become weighed down.

Oh my enemies you say! No! understand that there is nothing that anyone can do to you except the lord has permitted it. He may be using it as his tool to make you stronger OR to cause your faith in him to become unwavering OR to cause many to know him through his answer to your prayers. Whatever the outcome, be thankful.
I hear you say “Onuoma it’s easy to say but difficult to do”, yes it is at first but overtime it’ll become a part of you and that smile on your face will keep being there and you will keep permeating a radiance that won’t go unnoticed. Not packaging oh lol.. an inner radiance that permeates and stems only from an unwavering trust in God.

So to end, I’ll leave you will this passage..”In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you” 1 Thessalonians 5 v 18.