In today’s post I’ve chosen to digress in a different sort of way.
I’ve so many times pondered why I’m actually reserved and it causes me to recall that it’s typically as a result of my health. Considering the fact that I was ill on several occasions, and constantly away from school, I began to withdraw from others during my early childhood and constantly spent time all by myself, reflecting, wishing and thinking. I remember quite vividly a birthday party that was organized for me by my parents during my elementary school days. My mum had stumbled across paper cards that I had been designing to invite my close schoolmates for the last birthday I would have to celebrate in my elementary school and had secretly whispered to my dad the need to throw a bash for me. Of course to my dismay, majority of my elementary schoolmates were absent from the birthday party because I was unaware of my parents intentions until the very last minute. No one had remembered to ask Onuoma who she wanted as an invitee at her party, so on my party date I found myself surrounded by cousins and distant relatives etc…..you know how it ends.

This incident further pushed me into a shell because for a young child key friendships start forming during such days, anyhow, as I moved over to high school, I found myself becoming more sickly and the fact that I was constantly absent from school made me a lot more reserved. Overtime as more of my birthdays came along, the option of celebrating was not considered by me because I had learnt gradually to accept my solitude. Oh! don’t get me wrong, it’s not as if I don’t have friends, I do, but I guess there are various depths of friendships and to an extent it cannot be forced but can only come naturally.
What then did I do with my time you’ll ask? thinking. In fact it’s become so ingrained in me that sometimes when people talk in groups I prefer to think and enjoy my solitude and constantly have to call myself to order. Listening for me is something I do with a lot of of focusing rather than thinking.

So, I know you’ll probably be wondering where I’m headed with all this, to say the truth, the direction of my writing did take a different turn today, quite different from what I had in mind but nonetheless I believe some of you may have at one time or the other been uncomfortable with feelings of intense quietness. You shouldn’t be because on many occasions such quietness is only when you can tune into your inner-self and birth not only creativity but also hear the leading of the spirit of God. How does he speak if you don’t take a few minutes to listen or you simply shy away from solitude and sober reflection.

We all at certain times in our life need solitude and to tap into the one with whom our inner strength lies, our teacher, comforter and friend. I’m not insisting that you all become like me because every human was born different rather I’m suggesting to you the importance of quietness and sober reflection. To an extent if you come to terms with periods of quietness in your life, you’ll tend to draw strength from within and any emptiness or void would be immediately noticed and properly dealt with. You could also find it to be times of refreshing. The bible speaks about this in Isa 30v15 “ For thus said the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel …….in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.”.

I’ve noticed that during such periods of quietness, I’ve actually been creative and resolved important issues just by pondering over them and quietly asking the Lord for his leading. You never can tell the inner peace and strength that you can draw from such periods.